Disposition Daze

Imagine, we are handed a beautiful gift of basically time being stopped while the whole earth remains in a state of paused panic and distress. You are never given the chance to intentionally have nothing to do and just take time to collect yourself. Extra time to stay inside and enjoy the little things that we tend to forget in our fast-paced world. What would you do with your extra time??? Despite what you may be thinking, there is always a positive side to every negative situation. Let’s think about this whole coronavirus fiasco…

It is the most detrimental event to happen in my lifetime and this situation is something that I thought only really happened in the movies. I just sort of thought that in our day and age, we are in a way invincible to everything even though, we are only human. To be completely transparent, at first, I was really scared because this type of thing has never really happened, and I was more scared of the unknown versus what was happening in the present. In my opinion, I think that everyone was more worried about the indefinite outcome versus actually being worried about this virus potentially wiping out the entire population. I can understand why people were worried about supplies and excessively stocking up on toilet paper and cleaning products, but is it really necessary to be that greedy over essential products? Seriously, I just do not understand some people’s mentality. People’s true colors are revealed during a time in crisis. I have always just grown up wanting to help others out and making sure that everyone is doing okay instead of solely focusing on myself. I am very fortunate to be at home with my parents and I do not have to really worry about buying my own food right now, so I decided to give back to the people that really need help. Last week, I made around 30 sack lunches and a casserole to hand out to the homeless people downtown. I know that I am very blessed to be able to have a roof over my head, food in my pantry and enough in my savings to be able to stay home and save other people from potentially getting sick, but others are not as lucky. We need to really think about other’s livelihood and how shutting the whole world down can basically ruin someone’s current life track. This is why I think it is so valuable to be able to help others out during a time of such drastic need. Despite what you believe, karma is a real thing and whatever you do will eventually come back to you…

These past weeks of being isolated and completely left alone with my thoughts, it gave me a new perspective on the world. I’ve been home for however long we’ve been in quarantine and I never realized all the little things that we take for granted. Yes, I am grateful each day for the miniscule opportunities I take for granted such as being able to breathe clean air, drink pure water, listen to good music and dance around wherever I want. Our world basically changed overnight and life as we know it will never be the same. As a whole population, I’m sure there are some things we never thought would be taken away from us. I have not been able to hug my grandparents when I bring them dinner, can’t go to see the newest movie when it is released, unable to sit in church as a whole congregation and I didn’t realize how much I would miss seeing my friends and family in person every day. By having these thoughtless, everyday activities taken away from us, I think we have forgotten what is really important. The entire human race is in such a rush to get back to the quick paced speed of life, but we should use this time to really ponder about what things in life are worth rushing back to. 

Over the past three weeks, I’ve become a new woman…not exactly at all, but I know how to kind of bake. I’ve been taking total advantage about this entire situation and being home without one single responsibility. Okay, I’m lying I have school still, but I’ve been trying to just push through that. I haven’t written a blog in forever because I have been a sponge recently and have tried to just take in everything that is going on around me. The world has finally begun to relax, and it is so much easier to see what is actually going on without the clouded haze of excessive social media posting, intense societal outings and the immense pressure of always having to be doing something. I’ve finally had enough time to sit down and focus on the things that I’ve always wanted to do but claimed to never have time for. I have actually made a decent chunk in the book I’m currently reading, Little Women, and it feels so nice to be able to sit and drink some green tea and read a book without having to worry about doing something else. One thing I have never been really good at is cooking and I lowkey cannot stop eating sweets ever, so I decided to try baking. I’ve been looking up recipes and trying out new desserts. So far, I’ve made some cookies, an apple crisp, cheesecake and banana bread. Not to say I am an advanced pâtissier or anything like that, but I know how to bake now. I’ve also been journaling a lot more and setting time aside to write about not really what I’m doing each day (it’s basically the same thing), but I’ve focused more on what I am feeling and how this has affected me. There was a book that my cousin from California sent me whenever I graduated high school and I never had time to go over all of it. It is 52 lists of happiness and you’re supposed to do it each week, but I never really set aside the time for it each week. I am also so grateful that I brought my record player home because I have finally been able to listen to every single song on all my vinyls. I’ve been passing the days by worrying about having inner peach instead of being so anxious about going back into the world.

There is a great long list of positives I want to talk about that have come from this disaster, but I really want to go on a full tangent about them. Get ready to hear me go off about how amazing mother nature is doing, how the fashion industry is finally getting a break to catch up and people being able to connect with their family during this pandemic..

Published by Allison C Dibble

I am a college girl, looking for ways to be trendy and save money. You can see a taste of my life by my outfits and my everyday activities.

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